Monday, January 14, 2013

Saudi Girl bangs and then gets banged up!


By Alison Royer

I may have just discovered the smartest family ever.  


Exhibit 1: Two years ago, a high school girl from Saudi Arabia eloped with four men.  (I'm still unclear about what "eloped" means but based on all the brouhaha that followed, I'm pretty sure it means "bang").  When caught, she told her father that she had mysteriously fallen asleep in a classroom, was then abducted for a brief stint before being safely dropped back off at school.  THE FATHER BELIEVED THIS MALARKEY and then immediately called the police.  It took the police about 30 seconds to figure out that high-school broad was lying. 

Exhibit 2:  Once the authorities got involved, the high-school girl was obviously jailed and lashed (I love how lashing is an actual thing).  Unclear why high-school girl even came back.  I mean…it's Saudi Arabia and you're a woman.  Run for your life little one.  But no, she returned only to be jailed and then…

Exhibit 3:  Somewhere in there the dad beat his daughter to death.  He then took her to the hospital and claimed that "she had lost consciousness suddenly."  (Good cover pops.)  Of course when you beat someone to death it causes bruising and once again this brilliant family was caught.

I wish I could say this story surprises me but at this point it's old hat.  Just ask these guys.

As usual, I hate everyone.

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