By Alison Royer
What the hell is Islam?
Is it bigger than a bread box? Is
it a country? Is it attacking America as
we speak? All valid questions. I jumped into the Google machine to see what
I could come up with. Turns out Islam is
a religion. If you adhere to Islam, you're
a Muslim. We all know how confused I was about that situation.
Apparently, the people of Islam believe that there's a God
and they call this dude Allah. They
believe that Allah gave the 411 to Muhammad by way of the archangel Gabriel and
then somehow a book was written – The Qur'an.
This all struck me as very familiar so I did some more
research. I started to think maybe I was
a Muslim only to realize Christianity is eerily similar to Islamic religion. As it turns out, Christians believe that God
had a son named Jesus and that Jesus was born to a virgin named Mary. Turns out an angel named Gabriel gave the 411
to Mary, letting her know she was knocked up.
And guess what else? They wrote a
book about it – the Bible.
Jews believe in God.
They believe that God sent a message to Moses and that Moses…wrote a
book. Technically Moses also wrote the
bible but the Jews believe the new testament is a bag of lies so in Jewish
religion the book is called The Torah.
Tricky, tricky….Oh God…maybe I'm Jewish?
Listen, it's clear that all of these religions are vastly
different and we should definitely fight to the death over all their
trivialities. Carry on world….
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